I've been struggling to write this post since Monday evening. It started as a personal story about my own political stance and how it's evolved over the years (some of that is still in here). Then it became about the election itself and the results. Now, as the week has progressed, I've been thinking about the things about this election, and its aftermath, that have been troubling me.

Background

I turned 18 in the year 2000, and couldn't have been more excited to vote for George W. Bush to enter the White House. President Clinton had been impeached, and acquitted, in the couple years prior. His would-be successor, Al Gore was just more of the same thing, and that just couldn't happen. We needed a pro-life president who believed in liberty (because Democrats don't believe in it, you see). It was fairly simple, and for the most part it worked for me.

These were everywhere in the 90's. At least I THINK that's what they said.

Don't Blame Me

I grew up in the semi-rural suburbs of the suburbs of St Louis, right smack in the middle of the country. I considered myself a pretty average American. I was home schooled (you can judge me or my parents for that, but it probably won't make you any happier). I went to a small church in a small town. None of that particularly matters, except to say that I grew up knowing that Republicans were good and Democrats were bad.

Republicans believe in restoring America to its ever-disappearing roots. Democrats want to march us straight into communism. Republicans are real Americans who believe in hard work and don't want a handout. Democrats are people who believe in letting others mooch off the system by stealing money from hard working real Americans (presumably Republicans). Republicans are patriots, and Democrats certainly can't be. There was no such thing as trying to find out another person's perspective. There was no such thing as grace. There was no such thing as middle ground. To take the middle ground - to offer a compromise, was to surrender your ideals to some "libtard" progressive Dumbocrat. (I feel like these insults were written by children - maybe that's part of the problem.) Editor's note: Is it okay to have a parenthetical inside a parenthetical? Is that what this is?

After growing up, getting a real job, and meeting lots of interesting people who weren't what I grew up with, I learned a few things. At first, I learned that "real" people were fewer and farther between than what I had grown up with. Then I learned that "they" were just like me. They had families and hobbies and churches and neighbors and ideas and dreams and beliefs. But they were still wrong. Misguided at best, perhaps sincere, but otherwise didn't really hold any beliefs that lined up with mine, and were therefore objectively wrong.

Later on I went to a new church. In my old church (if you're still there, I'm sorry, but you can't say it isn't true), political ideology and faith were one in the same. In fact, being a conservative, patriotic (there it is again), pro-life, pro-gun, Jesus loving, immigrant hating Republican was practically a requirement. We had entire Sunday services devoted to worshiping our country - usually around Independence Day and on Memorial Day weekend. If you don't know what this is, it's a thing where a church of hundreds of people gathers on a Sunday morning and sings songs about our nation, our military, our flag, and our infallible Constitution. Instead of Jesus. If that doesn't seem weird to you, I'm sorry. You should get out more.

Anyway, the new church. I was very surprised to meet a diverse group of people (in a mostly white, above median income sort of way). There were people worshiping alongside me who held vastly different views from what I grew up with. There were people who proudly voted for Obama (twice even!). People who thought it's fine to shoot guns, bad to abort babies, okay to tax people to pay for food for poor people, bad to deport immigrants, good to serve in the military, and bad to pick a party line and stand behind it. These were people who were more conservative in their theology than what I was used to, but somehow less conservative in their politics.

So, between some really good people in my church who challenged me to look at the world through a different lens, some really good people I worked with who challenged my perceptions of what "they" are, and just some good old fashioned growing up, my political views are both more solid and more flexible than they've ever been. I'm truly thankful for these people. I can no longer look at a poor person with contempt (it's shameful to admit that that's really what my old "conservative" views were doing). I can no longer paint with a broad brush the type of people I disagree with on one or potentially all issues. I think I'm a better person for it. Certainly more gracious, more humble, and more willing to listen.

The Elephant (and jackass) In the Room

Donald Trump just won the election, and he's not a very good person.

I mean, he might be, but that means his entire campaign has been a lie, and a perpetual liar is not a very good person. It seems like a lot of people put hope in Hillary Clinton, because they're absolutely devastated today. A lot of people put it in Donald Trump, because they're over the moon today. It's totally fine to be disappointed in the outcome of the election, or to be perfectly happy with it. But let's get a few things straight.

Stop acting as though the world ended Tuesday

About half the people who turned out to vote decided that Donald Trump is the right man for the job. I don't think he is. I think he's said and done some pretty terrible things. I think he doesn't stand for the rights of the oppressed or marginalized. I think he is a pathological liar. Facts don't seem to matter to him or his supporters.

I don't mean to be insensitive when I say this, but I think Trump will be a pretty ordinary president. I don't think he'll do any of the outlandish things he campaigned on. I don't think people need to fear his time in the White House. I know there's a lot of fear, anguish, and disgust over the outcome of the election, but…

Presidents don't write policy

All those threatening things Donald Trump has said aren't going to become the law of the land. Trump isn't going to build a wall on our southern border. (Hillary Clinton at one point believed in a border fence.) Trump isn't going to deport anyone. He isn't going to end gay marriage. He isn't going to single-handedly dismantle our union.

Trump supporters aren't racists, misogynists, and bigots

Sure, some of them might be. It is not good that David Duke and the KKK support Donald Trump. I don't believe they make that claim because they like him. I believe they make that claim because they want to be inflammatory. Donald Trump is foolish for not condemning them. He's probably not dangerous though.

Simply disagreeing with someone (even disapproving of their behaviors or beliefs) isn't hate

Why are